Enola Martinez

Enola Martinez

@redelephant976270 · Jan 10, 2026

I bought porn even though I have a girlfriend then I had a bad dream and cried

I feel absolutely disgusted of myself. It was night and I saw some only fans creator post on Instagram and I decided to buy it. That's $20 that I will never get back and after I finished a sudden wave of regret hit me.
I feel like an absolute piece of shit if my girlfriend did this to me l would feel like shit, I hate myself for doing this
Then, when I went to sleep, I had a dream about me and my girlfriend and we were on a date and then she just suddenly collapsed and stopped breathing and I was crying so hard in the dream and when I woke up, I was even crying irl

Enola Martinez

@redelephant976270 · Jan 10, 2026

I waited 5 months to find my own doctor

This was one of the first times I truly advocated for myself medically.
I had severe abdominal pain that they had me wait 6 months to treat- I had to seek out my own surgeon who would listen to me.
I had a HIDA scan run at about 4 months (they finally caved and ran one) and my gallbladder was TOO active. My doctor who ordered it (also my gastrointestinal surgeon from a surgery 5 months prior) said that isn’t a thing and to tough it out, I must just be eating wrong or having an unusually hard time recovering from the first surgery.
My new general surgeon said that absolutely was a thing, wanted it out as soon as possible- I am a music director and had to tough it out one more week to get through my winter concert. I don’t work a job where I can easily be replaced. He had me in the day after the concert, pulled out my gallbladder (I had to get the IV in my foot 0/10, do not recommend), and guess what, my pain was gone as soon as I stopped processing the pain of that surgery!
Whodathunk.
If I had stayed with the original surgeon I’d probably still have my gallbladder and still be in that pain. And with my mental health, who knows where that would’ve taken me.
I feel a little asham

Enola Martinez

@redelephant976270 · Jan 10, 2026

My biggest motivators for losing weight is envy

I used to be bestfriends with this one girl in early highschool. We were super close and we were both slightly chubby. A few years later she slowly drifted away from me and our friendship ended. I'm not sure what she did, maybe a combination of working out and starving herself, but when she shed the excess fat... damn. The hip to waist ratio went crazy. She had like the ideal body that I wanted. I'm unfortunately build like a rectangle. Anyways I did gain 80 pounds since then. Currently in my early 20s and 200 pounds. Trying to lose the weight but man it can be hard. Sometimes I look her up on social media just to motivate myself.

Enola Martinez

@redelephant976270 · Jan 9, 2026

What is your go-to comfort meal when you've had a long day?

I just got home after a seriously long day and im finallt sitting on my couch with the most basic meal ever, literally just noodles, butter and a bit of salt, but its honestly the best thing i've tastes all week. sometimes you dont need a fancy dinner, just need something warm that doesn't require any brain power to make.
what's your go-to when you're totally drained and just need some comfort food? are you a cereal for dinner kind of person or are just hitting up doordash?

Enola Martinez

@redelephant976270 · Jan 9, 2026

My dad showed up to my wedding drunk and ruined everything

I didn’t even know he was drinking again.
He hugged me too tight, smelled like whiskey, and whispered, 'don’t mess this up like your mom did.' I laughed it off at first.
During the speeches he stood up without being asked and said, 'well, let’s hope this one lasts longer than your mom’s marriage.'
My wife cried. I couldn’t even look at him.
I haven’t spoken to him since. It’s been 3 years and people still bring it up like it’s a funny story.