Emilis Furuseth

Camila Contreras

@silverzebra603973 · Jan 12, 2026 5:08 am

I'm starting to think I need to weigh the pros and cons of killing myself

It's like this:
I want to transition from gender to another. I've *been* wanting to do this for months, and I have a consultation set up so I can get my desired hormones sooner rather than later. I think that my family will accept me, and I currently live someplace where I can get the support I need.
But with things as they are in the world...bad things could happen to me. *Soon*. Just for even *thinking* about doing this, let alone trying to pass.
Understand that I don't feel violently dysphoric in my body. Rather, the inverse is simply *euphoric*. But do you know what I was doing before I started thinking about transitioning? Smoking weed and drinking as often as I could without getting violently ill (and I failed at that a few times). Note that the drinking and smoking had nothing to do with wanting to transition (or at least I don't think it did). Rather, my life had stalled. *Has* stalled, honestly. It's not as though nothing good happens to me...but it's going nowhere. I've run low on ambitions. I'm not interested in much. Even after starting antidepressants, at best I still felt *closed off* from having any passion for anything.
Switching genders, though? *That* excites me.

Allan Simmons

@blacklion900609 · Jan 12, 2026 12:40 am

i feel like i deserve a thanks for living alone for four years at 11 years old.

when i was about ten my grandmother got extremely ill and nobody else could look after her but my mother who is a single mother and unfortunately i have no siblings so my options either were i go down my grandmother house everyday when her whole house was falling apart, it was constantly so cold you could see your own breath and be alone because my mothers full attention would be on my grandmother or be home alone in my own house that isnt falling apart and isnt cold.
eleven year old me ended up deciding to just be completely home alone because i didnt really have any other option. being home alone lasted just until i turned 15 because thats when my grandmother passed away. i never really got a thanks for being home alone for almost every single day from the age of eleven when i feel i shoudve to some extent.
it was everyday i was alone. i have no siblings or father who could keep me company. my mother would leave for work around 8-9am and then come home around 8pm but by then she would be exhausted from working and looking after my grandmother that she would go straight to bed because she was also ill with dizzy spells. so for me it felt like i was constantly home alone.
i didnt g