Andres Guerin

@bluebutterfly289172 · Jan 10, 2026 at 8:08 pm

Years of being unhappy

I am a 39 (f) with two boys, 18 and 11. I have been with my husband for 20 years and married for 18.
I'm going to throw a lot of info here for context so you can truly see where I'm at and why I need to get this off of my chest.
\- My husband was my first real relationship at 20. He was freshly 18 when we got together. I had a lot of childhood trauma where I avoided romantic relationships throughout my teen years. Sexual molestation from a male cousin from age 5 to 13, a narcissistic mother, and a lot of family drama. I just focused on school and being left alone mostly. I did have friends, but they weren't important. Once I graduated high school and got into college and started working, I did eventually lose my virginity, and I probably did it a total of 4 times before I got into a relationship with my husband. I was so very inexperienced and did not know what was good and what was bad.
\- We moved in together within the first month, and then I got pregnant within two months of us getting together. I have PCOS and was told it was a very slim chance I would get pregnant on my own. But they didn't explain that eating healthier and losing weight can cause ovulation to return. And it